About the friendship

John 15:13-15

Friendship is the expression of true feelings of the heart to each other that reveals the entire depth of soul aspirations, concerns, and anxiety; it’s the feeling of readiness to share his/her pain with other and even readiness to give own soul for your friend.

Source of friendship, as every good, superb feeling to each other, is in God.

1) About friendship between people. Proverbs. 27:9.

Proverbs 17:17. You”ll find  true friend in adversity. Strenght of friendship continues even in the difficult days. This  measure should help to evaluate our friends. Finally it shows what  kind  of friend they are. There is a proverb: “In days of trouble you’ll find out your friend”.

“Only at the twilight of life shines brightly glow of true friendship; brilliance of happiness darkens its luster” (Francis Bacon).

Examples of friendship:

1)    Ruth and Naomi (Ruth 1 chapter).

2)    David’s friend Hushai (2 Samuel 15:37).

3)    Jonathan and David (1 Samuel 18:1.  2 Samuel 1:26). Jonathan gave to David a whole his soul. He has resisted his father’s rage just for the love of friend. He didn’t want to be an accomplice of injustice. David has served saving Jonathan’s  son and nephew from death and took care about them as of own children.

4)    Jesus and Lazarus (John 11:11). Jesus hurried to Lazarus when he was in trouble. He showed an example of true friendship.

5)    Mark, son of Peter (1 Peter 5:13).

6)    Priscilla, Aquila and Paul (Romans 16:4).

7)    Paul about Titus (2 Corinthians 2:13).

8)    John next to Jesus (John 13:23). Jesus trusted him His secrets not only when He was with John, but also after His Ascension (Book of Revelation).

Proverbs 18:14. We personally should be friendly, if we want to have friends (Parable of the Good Samaritan). It happens that friends are more valuable than relatives. “Who do you love more, once was asked one wise man: “brother or your friend”. Wise man answered: “ I will not love my brother if he is not my friend”. Next of kin is the part our flesh; friend is the part of our soul. True friend is sincere and faithful  – it’s his saint duty. (Luke 11:5).

But to be friend it doesn’t mean to do everything what other is doing.  “I don’t need a friend who changes when I change and who nods when I nod; my shadow does that much better!”. (Plutarch).

Friendship is not created for the smiling (cheerful) entertainment, but to warn a friend who has been fascinated by prohibited things (Proverbs 27:6, part 1). Tested friend is the second our conscience; could it be something more useful than a friend who reproaches for our mistakes? Only in one case we shouldn’t be afraid to insult a friend, it is the situation when we tell him all truth and in such way we prove him our own loyalty. “A man who flatters his neighbor, is spreading a net for his steps” (Proverbs 29:5). So we shouldn’t deprive friendship of its rights. Who tells me truth about myself, if not a friend; and it’s compulsory to hear truth about you from a friend.

But this we should do sincerely, with love, in a genuine friendship. The only on true friend is that who knows everything good and bad in your life, and always respects you. Such friend seeks to help other to become better person forgiving his mistakes (Proverbs 17:9).

Friends can’t require doing business, actions which are not compatible with good nature, faith and honor. Truth should be the most valuable of all things (Deuteronomy 13:6.8).

Cooperation of friends for the evil actions is not noble, saint friendship but it’s a crime (bright example is union of Korah, Dathan and Abiram). Union of bad people is not a partnership but it’s a conspiracy. They don’t love each other, but rather they’re afraid of each other, they are not friends but accomplices. The same is friendship with a world for the bad action, it can’t be friendship with true, clean. It’s also an evil. We also should know limit in a friendship (Proverbs 25:17).

There is no need and it’s not useful always share secrets with a friend. Because that there are family  and church secrets. True friend will not  require that is not relative to him.

We should guard, evaluate friendship and we should develop it (Proverbs 27:10, part 1). We can’t laught at friend. Betray, cunning and insult kill friendship (Proverbs 29:5. Psalms 55:12-14. Proverbs 17:9. Jeremiah 9:4-5).

2) About friendship in a family. Ecclesiastes 4:9-12.

Earlier a husband and a wife had to be friends in the Nation of Israel (Malachi 2:14. Song of Songs  2:9. 5:16). A spouse would be able to be friends only, when they’ll attach to each other not just externally, but internally as well, i.e. spiritual connection. And it’s the most important unity. The ideal of marriage is that through the physical closeness would be reached spiritual (divine) unity.

Any union based only on physical aspects will  be unstable. From here emerges breakup of marriages. Enlightening example  is of Samson and Delilah. They didn’t have sincere and genuine friendship.And we see certain results that derives from here). It’s dreadful when a spouse lives together but separately. For this reason are right those who teach that those who are getting married  should have common ideals, common aspirations (desires). All of this will help to reach the unity. The true friends could be only those who have similar thoughts. And similarities ties hearts.

3) About friendship with God.

Jesus shared secrets with his disciples (John 15:15). It’s the biggest proof of friendship  to share own secrets. We also should share all our secrets, all our spiritual worries  and anxieties in  a pray with God, and then we’ll receive a relief from Him.

Abraham was named  a friend of God ( 2 Chronicles 20:7) because that he has shared worries with Him and was getting a friendly support.

“You did not choose me; I chose you” , said Jesus (John 15:16). He was the first who was looking for the friendship with us. Let’s stretch our hands to Him, to the Great Friend, Who has never betrayed and never betrays.

So let’s develop noble feelings of friendship to our close friends, family and to God.

Amen.

By Vladimir Shelkov

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